Filed under: Love

If I Were A Boy – Beyonce

If I were a boy
even just for a day
I’d roll out of bed in the morning
and throw on what I wanted and go

Drink beer with the guys
and chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
and I’d never get confronted for it
cause they stick up for me

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
so they’d think that I was sleeping alone

I’d put myself first
and make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’ll be faithful,
waiting for me to come home, to come home.

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say it’s just a mistake,
think i’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
you thought wrong

But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand
and you don’t understand, ohhhh
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’re taking her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

But you’re just a boy

——————————-

Home Ain’t Where His Heart Is Anymore – Shania Twain

He knew how to reach me deep inside
And he found a part of me I could not hide
And we’d walk and talk and touch tenderly
Then he’d lay me down and make love to me

We built a love so strong it couldn’t break
There was not a road we were afraid to take
And we’d kiss all the way from Arkansas to Rome
‘Cause in each other’s arms we were home sweet home

But he don’t feel the same
Since our lives became
Years of bills, babies and chains

Home ain’t where his heart is anymore
He may hang his hat behind our bedroom door
But he don’t lay his head down to love me like before
Home ain’t where his heart is anymore

If foundations made of stone can turn to dust
Then the hardest hearts of steel can turn to rust
If he could only find that feeling once again
If we could only change the way the story ends

And he may still come home
But I live here alone
The love that built these walls is gone

Home ain’t where his heart is anymore
He may hang his hat behind our bedroom door
But he don’t lay his head down to love me like before

He don’t lay his head down to love me like before
Home ain’t where his heart is anymore
No, home ain’t where his heart is

Filed under: Family, Me, Rants

I had to write this down SOMEWHERE because I am really pissed off. I thought about Facebook, but there is too many in-laws and family members not my own that read it, that would get angry.

My family has allergies. I’m pretty sure that in some of my many entries I have stated this fact. So if you are a reader who has stuck by me from the beginning, you know this.

Matthew has had Asthma since he was a kid. Supposedly his parents also had a cat when he was little and it made him very ill. I have had Asthma since I was a toddler. Back then it was mostly controlled by a heavy dosage of meds. My parents weren’t very responsible and bought animal after animal, EVEN AFTER learning that I was allergic to animal dander. These days my allergies to them are much more severe, but my Asthma is better and controlled by exercise and not much else (I do use my inhaler occasionally, but it’s mostly when I’ve been around animals or cold weather).

When Leilani was a toddler we noticed she would get sick whenever around animals. Then in Florida she developed a cough that later we found out was Asthma. Her’s is mild, but can get worse when around allergens and cold weather.

Forrest has some form of an animal allergy. We aren’t sure if it’s all animals, but he is definitely allergic to dogs. It seems his DNA decided to go another direction and gave him Autism instead of Asthma.

Lauralei was breastfed for 14 months. I tried my damnedest to make sure she didn’t develop Asthma and I am so angry that it didn’t turn out that way. She is the sickest child of the three of them. Always developing colds. Every time she gets a cold she gets extremely sick and has to use the Nebulizer for a week. Regular Asthma drugs like Albuterol do nothing, so she needs it combined with a steroid inside the Nebulizer. She has been sick so many times this year I have lost count. When she is around ANY animal dander she gets a cold, which in turn develops into her respiratory infection.

Matt’s family doesn’t seem to understand. We have gone to many of their family events through the years and most of us come away feeling awful. Wheezing for days (sometimes more than a week for Lauralei and I) and feeling like someone has squeezed our lungs with a vise. It isn’t fun to feel that way for a long time.

So just recently I have decided to forgo every single event in the future at his dad’s house (his dad owned a dog for years and the dander is EVERYWHERE even though the animal is gone) and possibly only go to his Granny’s twice a year. His grandma doesn’t own pets, but most all of his family members do.

Can you believe it only takes a little bit of dander on someone’s clothing to make us sick? You probably don’t, because you don’t have Asthma or allergies to animal dander.

It’s not fair to live like this and make the kid’s lives miserable by not letting them go to friend’s houses that have pets, but it’s life. It’s our life. And I know I may sound like an overbearing parent, but I want my kids to be able to breathe well and not feel terrible.

Matt’s dad invited us over for dinner at his house this Sunday. The last time we went, Lauralei got very sick. It took me a week to recover. He has been putting new flooring down and the dog is gone. But his father doesn’t clean. The house is always dirty. I can guarantee there is dander lying around. So we aren’t going. It upsets Matt a little and I understand where he is coming from. It’s his family…but this is MY family and I need to protect them. So I am finally taking responsibility for their health.

So if his family doesn’t like it, then they can all just kiss my ass. I am literally SICK and tired of their ignorance.

Filed under: Cool Links, Me

I just made a donation to Boobiethon AND I submitted a couple shots of my rack! Haha!

It was actually harder than I thought this time around. I tried to be more creative than I was last year with some material I had, but man, it’s hard to take a picture of your own boobs! Especially when they aren’t the perkiest. Darn kids. Oh but it’s worth it. They are worth it. I love my kids more than anything and I’m so happy I am healthy and get to watch them grow up. FEEL YOUR BOOBIES GIRLS!!! So you can see your kids grow up too!

This is my cool little button for donating. I am going to do it every year!

Filed under: Me, My Business

I’m walking!!!!!

I started last week Tuesday, after my appointment. The doctor said my x-rays looked good and to begin full weight bearing. So as soon as he said that, I did! I went into a cleaning frenzy the next couple of days and did a LOT of work, then ended up having to rest because my leg didn’t like it. I graduated to a cane, so I look and sometimes feel like a much older person. Crutches at least give off the idea that something was recently broken.

My Achilles is tightly wound. Well it feels like it is anyway.The mobility in my entire ankle is bad, so I have a pronounced limp. I do exercises for it about 3 days a week like the doctor told me. I hope I can get mobility back on my own because I know physical therapy will cost more money we don’t have.

There is still pain at times and the swelling comes and goes, but I’m getting better!

Because things are improving I have to start thinking about the business again. I had a nice little break for a while but it’s time to get serious again. Plans are to reschedule my Open House in October and leave Brown Bag then. I have the vinyl for my car. Now I just need to draw up a waiver (found out I can do it without needing a lawyer), get a business license and find out about liability insurance. And, I need to get back to dancing!

For now I will end this entry with: Five things that made having a broken leg, not so bad.

1) I gained a wonderful amount of upper body strength from using the crutches and hauling myself around.
2) People are a lot nicer to you and you get waited on.
3) The realization that my break and my life isn’t that bad. I have all of my limbs and eventually my leg will work right. Having limited mobility opened my eyes about the disabled. I saw things from their perspective and realized how awful it was not being able to do things for myself.
4) Very cool x-rays that I get to keep forever.
5) Watched lots of cool movies through Netflix and On Demand. Alone. What’s better than that?